1. |
Camus
02:31
|
|||
The first thing is, you gotta believe that change is possible.
You have to tell yourself everyday, "I can change, and I will change."
LOUDER
I can change
mm fuck it...
did you used to get the feeling, everything was for a reason
and symbolic of a greater happening but now you wake up
every morning without that feeling, and every breath feels like you're peeling
off a scab that hasn't healed for years and years and years and years and years
for the second time today you lost your way you lost your way
and i've all but forgotten how you used to say you used to say that
our bodies were all that we have so i made a map i made a map and when i mapped it out i found something new, and we both we both forgot you
|
||||
2. |
||||
when i was younger i didn't feel old
and now i'm younger but i'm starting how to learn how to do what i'm told
so every night i'm smoking cigarettes in my dreams
i'm losing my teeth
and every night i wake up 3 am
on the nose
and there's no feeling in my toes
but my teeth are still at home
so i thank my lucky stars that i'm alive
and i thank god that im alive
and i thank god i haven't died
and i thank god i'm gonna die
but mother nature and father
time have combined to
insure that your demise is a
gradual decline
and the choice is up to you
whether it comes pretty soon
or whether you stay to pay your dues
just don't watch the evening news
cause i for one placed my cosmic bets on a dying sun
so when tomorrow morning comes
i'll press my fingers against my gums
and maybe this will be the glitch
when exposed nerves meet my finger tips
as cartilage and ligaments crack and splinter out my skin
and when they splinter out my skin
metamorphoses begins
my heart refracts a sinister twin
breathing without oxygen
and though i try to smother it
it breathes
it beats
it ticks as if counting down the inevitable
regression to a place before space and time
when our fetal conscious were entwined
before we separately broke free and
and crash landed separately
and now stranded separately
but some of us have memories
and we want back so god help me
we're trying can't you see
it's almost 1 now i must be home
but we can't that word without a sarcastic overtone
and, wouldn't it be nice to go to sleep
when the ocean washes over my grave it's gonna wash over yours too. that's right mother fucker, when i go down i'm taking you with me. when my rotting corpse is laid beneath the sand you will be my postmortem twin. i don't care what it takes, you're never going to hurt anyone ever again.
when you entered this world beside me, you vowed- you… you vowed to make me angry.
when you entered this world beside me you vowed to forever change the way i perceive reality. you promised to make every day drag on for eternity and every night feel like tumbling deeper and deeper into the inky blackness of what i thought was a bottomless well. but i hit the bottom hard, and now climbing to the top faster than you ever thought i would, and as the universe is my witness, i'm gonna get you.
|
||||
3. |
||||
i have scene which repeats itself in my head.
it's begins with a close up shot of a young man looking into the camera. he pauses tentatively before asking
"do you really mean it, when you say i'm going to make it?"
the camera then rotates 180 degrees to reveal a woman of the same age standing opposite of him.
she extends her right hand, placing her palm softly on his cheek. she gazes at him with a look that falls somewhere in between pity and disdain and says
"the whole world will know will know your name before you even begin to realize what's happening, and you will drown surround by people who've never met you, and never will."
when she says this, her mouth moves and the words are heard, yet the two are not connected. it's not her. it's him.
i don't know if i'm trying to relate it to my own life and experiences, or if it's merely a half formed idea that my brain has chosen to latch onto.
either way, i think about it everyday, and sometimes it scares me.
it's not a visceral fear like my life is in danger
it's instead, a deep rooted feeling of unease, as if i'm observing something i was never meant to see.
i don't know if they're supposed to be humans, or just feelings which have been given physical form by something deep within my subconscious
whatever the answer may be—i'm afraid of her.
|
||||
4. |
Distance Formula
04:45
|
|||
am i are you still me still you
our minds wander farther and farther
my search for earthlings was disappointing
no one noticed me screaming
don't do drugs don't have unprotected sex don't smoke cigarettes don't hang out with those kids
don't take your parents for granted if you take on the world by yourself don't expect it to be easy
and i'm not coming back for
no i'm not coming back for you
but i'm not coming back for
i'm still not coming back for you
we're formless shapes running in place
when observed in our purest state
and in these confines we try to combine
pleasure, comfort, and meaningful lovers
but i'm not coming back for
i'm still not coming back for you
no i'm not coming back for
i'm never not coming back for you
(we're too scared to do shit)
don't do drugs don't have unprotected sex don't smoke cigarettes don't hang out with those kids
don't take your parents for granted if you take on the world by yourself don't expect it to be easy
and please just don't let them down just down let me down
please just don't let them down just down let me down
oh god
i’m scared and i know that you’re scared even if you don’t let on as much as i do
i used to distance to calculate how far we had grown, but obviously it didn’t yield the results i was looking for
as long as you're ok, i’m ok, and most of my fear and worries comes from that thought some someone’s out there taking advantage of you, which if you think about it is kind of ironic.
send your complaints, cease and desist,
car seat headrest, matador records.
|
||||
5. |
Girl Fever
03:49
|
|||
she’s a little bright silhouette in my chest
all the pain disappears when she comes near
these are silly things a naked girl some diamond rings
promising some relief false hope deceit
in 2099 the stars will align and present me with the secrets of life before i die
142 songs about you everyone of them a little less blue
oh girl, pointless in the vacuum which emerged from the death of a wonderful world
she’s all christened white broken light in my head
her smallest pain or biggest fear brings me to tears.
she lays in the sun holy one judgment day
seems to fall every hour she’s away
in 3099 i'll still be alive looking down at you from atop the star where i reside
6042 songs about you forever singing them into the blue
oh girl, pointless in the vacuum which emerged from the death of a wonderful world
hate the way i’m acting, act like its not acting. leave it all behind for you.
hate the way i'm feeling, actually love the feeling. leave it all behind for you.
|
||||
6. |
||||
i broke my arm i crashed my car
i broke the strings on my guitar
all at once
you hate i and so do me
i’m so drunk i can’t see
you just once
and i turned around just once
i turned back around
withering in my bud in complete
slithering sounds a ruck-us you see
sickness into the tub
something's up with me
for me to agree to
putting myself through hell
for the confidence to tell you
i broke my arm i crashed my car
i broke the strings on my guitar
all at once
you hate i and so do me
i’m so drunk i can’t see
you just once
and i turned around just once
i turned back around
something's up with the way you're moving
something's up with the way you're moving
something's up with the way you're moving
and it's not right
something's up with the way you're moving
something's up with the way you're moving
something's up with the way you're moving
and it's not right
oh what a mind you've left for me
i’ll fix my mind but it's not for you
oh what a mind you've left for me
i’ll fix my mind but it's not for you
(wait, wasn’t there gonna be… like a breakdown at the end?)
and i don't hate you as much as i wish i did
|
||||
7. |
||||
would you become the vultures
that circle ‘round my death
would you pick my bones clean
would you sever my serpent head
if you pop the thought bubbles
that circle round my head
would you devour what you find like it's enough or will you k-k-k-keep eating till i lose the essence of myself
r-r-r-r-r-row
sour ain't it, mother fucker?
oh yeah
somebody told me that the drugs don't work
but if the drugs don't work then what do you do?
gerard way told me that the drugs don't work
but if the drugs don't work then what do you do?
but if the drugs don't work all you've got is friends,
and if the friends don't work then what do you do?
cause if the drugs don't work and all i’ve got is friends,
but the friends don't work all i've got is you.
take of all our clothes and now we're hiding more than before
take a sip of this and you won't feel like hiding anymore
take a hit of this and you'll be finally fucking cured
take some off my lips and you'll swear you were never pinned as pure
i don't fuck with it fuck with it
watch the way i break as i don't
fuck with it fuck with it watch the i break.
love love i don’t fuck with it fuck love love love’s a virus in my brain
|
||||
8. |
Nothing But The Grass
02:14
|
|||
you can take our hearts
you can take our personalities but
even when we're wiped clean
we'll still be unhappy with what we've got
come on tell me you'll be there for me when
our bodies fall apart
oh tell me we'll be together when
ourselves become the art
you can take our grievances
you can take our discomfort but
even when we shouldn't be
we'll still be unhappy with what we've got
come on, come on, come on,
tell me you'll be there for me when
our bodies turn to glass
oh tell me we'll be together when
we're nothing but the grass
|
||||
9. |
||||
first verse reads out like a suicide note
ritually writing down an explanation
on a post-it note and sticking it to the wall
i don't know why i tell you anything anymore
it hasn't felt good in so long
it's not a relief it's a task, it's a drag
i'm a programed robot with a few key phrases like:
"i miss you"
"i am lonely"
"i want to die"
"this bed is bigger than i remember before you were here"
before you were here
i'm starting to scare myself
i used to feel bad, but now i only feel nothing
you could kill yourself tonight and i
don't know if i'd even care... at all
i want you dead, i want you dead,
i want you dead, i want you dead,
i want you dead, i want you dead,
i want you dead, i want you dead,
i want you dead, i want you dead,
i want you dead, i want you dead,
i want you dead, i want you dead,
i want you dead, i want you dead,
oxymoron, a statement that contradicts itself inherently.
politics, the political nature to the discourse of our apologies
look
i know, we all, get it, fucked up, sometimes, feels like, shit i, say don’t reflect how i feel.
feel like i see what needs fixing and i break it easy as speed of sound. do you feel me now? or did i make it worse? the former’s the intent, but the ladder’s just how it goes. and what’s the point of intent if the product’s burning coals.
we feel like we’re fucking broken but we’re not.
say it with me now.
i’m not evil, i’m not evil i’m not.
i’m not evil, at least i hope that i’m not.
but who am i to say the person i present is real.
true evil birds it’s time, hides, manifests in how i feel.
fuckin
i’m not evil, i’m not evil, i’m not.
i don’t have time for evil, i’m a good person, i thought.
but i stole that last lyric, so who’s to say that i’m honest.
can’t even vouch for myself, but i’m not evil, i promise.
|
||||
10. |
||||
it exists, an absolute more final than death.
azathoth blinks and you are condemned to an eternal state of being.
your reality deconstructed to an infinite degree, until nothing is left but the ability to hurt.
the sine wave equivalent of existence, all that remains is the
roaring tone of the strings you used to possess. if you had a mouth it would be screaming.
if you had ears they would bleed. but such is the blessing of mortality.
so why fight it?
the time has come to forget your love
it's all gone
the time has come to forget you were ever here
repaint the wall
where you wrote "joe was here" in some half hearted attempt
to make something you do matter
and to try and make you feel like
having left your mark is reason enough to leave
the clock is nearing that time of night or day
it doesn't really matter when you look at it that way, now does it
oh your misguided dreams of how other people feel
they never really mattered, and never really healed
the point was to adapt but all your sharp edges have dulled
but ill to fix you the best that i can
and we'll try to fix you the best that we can
the clock is nearing that time again when i'd
love to help but you wouldn't really try
and i know your brain won't let you
but my brains angry that your brain wants to die
and now i'm crying cause i'm scared i'll wake up
and you'll have vanished yeah you'll have disappeared
but i know you're always fighting
but now you're tired and now you've disappeared
but i tried to fix you the best that i could
and we tried to fix you the best that we could
1. something’s coming.
2. it’s out to get me
3. should i hide?
4. you don’t give a fuck
5. we’re all gonna die
6. it’s a thrill when it ticks
7.
8.
9.
10.
slit wrist misfit
slayer, swaying back and forth through the time lapse.
his eyes are six inches behind where they should be.
six feet deep in his mind and in time, in his black flag t-shirt.
fuck you, frenzy, pardon your obscenity.
eat his fucking corpse when he’s dead.
gorge yourself until you’re good and sick, little vulture.
i get tired when you text my phone
not because i don't wanna talk to you
it's because i know there's nothing i can do
to make you feel the way i want you to
so bring me down, down,
down with you
and when presented with a golden opportunity
i pussy out, well then fuck you too.
and when you ask me reply with “i don't know”
not cause it's true, cause it's the easiest answer
i’ll bring you down, down,
down with me
you don’t want life
don’t want to die
too scared to try
we have combined
our unconscious minds
it’s not alright
you witness me
falling to my
demise
soon you
follow suit
ooo
|
||||
11. |
||||
above the trees and beneath the sea
there’s a plan for you and me
something sweet carried away
by the breeze
when our graves were freshly dug
i went ghosting just above
now the earth is dry cold
and it hurts just the same
so call me if you’re feeling down
don’t matter how it feels right now
lovers will never truly die
Their particles will recollect in better lives
and in some future life
you’ll find a love so strong it clouds your eyes
and you won’t think of me
and i won’t dream of you for one more night
no matter what lies circle my head
i know we’ll never speak again
poisoned words and severed ties
and now I’m born again into life
so goodbye
|
||||
12. |
||||
i wouldn't tell you cause you wouldn't care
a conversation that i'd rather leave un-conversated
but i've been better lately for what it's worth
my insignificance has turned a sense of bitter sweet
not quite self worth but it's close to that
i used to stay up late and think
but now i don't think much about it
because the power of a fleeting thought
can be so easily misjudged by another one
and the power of your beating heart
can be so easily misconstrued
s a sinister drum
“this is the part of the conversation where i start to regret having it in the first place.”
but as i realized near the end of things,
there's no use for the thoughts of a free man once your fate is sealed.
and as he realized towards the beginning of things,
there's no use for the thoughts of ephrya when you're deep underground
but even if it doesn't work and even if it hurts i love you.
Thank you for listening to me.
|
Naming Planets Fairfax, Virginia
Solo project of
Sean Jensen.
Streaming and Download help
Naming Planets recommends:
If you like Naming Planets, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp